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Sometimes one can’t help but feel that something is wrong with themselves but that people are either missing it or being kind and in turn dishonest. One knows that every man has flaws and that every person’s character is being built. Yet they feel themselves to be the worst. In spite of redemption and the ongoing process of sanctification, that they are somehow missing something in their own lives that is keeping then from growth. Introspection brings only guilt; no thought to it brings carelessness and no kindness to the world around them. The answer is in resting in the grace of God. In spite of what one thinks of himself or others presume to know about Him, there is freedom in knowing it is covered. This giving us more of a reason to run from our sinful selves, the mistaken peers, and into God’s arms. He will calm our fears and doubts, decimate our insecurities. On occasion - He may choose to use someone here on Earth to do so, forcing us to treat the body of Christ as it was meant to be treated and bringing us together as one. But in the end, it was all His doing.

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Good Evening. I haven’t updated in a hundred and fifty years - and by that I mean a few weeks. 

Basically, life has been busy but good. I’ve had life issues like car troubles and a cough that’s been persistent for a month. I’ve had some good lessons and been reading a few chapters of another book by CS Lewis.
I’ve even been getting to bed early this week. 

My mother had surgery on her shoulder so she’s been a bit disabled this week. It’s been an anti-climactic post-Mother’s Day week for her to say the least. However, in a few weeks she will be up and about again. 

This weekend is an exciting one for me yet again. My friend is having her baby shower - and that due date is getting so close. I’m meeting early with a different friend for breakfast and shopping for the shower gift. Then the shower will come followed by a movie outing to see Star Trek. All in all, I’m looking forward it. 

For now, though, I’m going to go and watch a small part of the Dinotopia miniseries before I go to sleep. Why? When you remember something you loved as a child, you just have to revel in it a little bit more before you put it aside. 

Well, goodnight.

My Bad Bible Reading and Thoughts on John 2:12-17

I think I must be the slowest Bible studier on the face of this planet. Sometimes I wonder if that’s horrible. (Some would argue “yes.”) However, I don’t understand how people can go through chapter after chapter, understand it, and retain it. (The retaining part in particular.) Perhaps I wasn’t blessed with such a mind, but in order for me to remember (and I never remember forever sadly) - I have to take in a little at a time. Do I want more? Yes. Yet, what good would it be for me to spend hours reading and writing- only to remember a small portion. I remember too little as it is. 

God’s word is just… there’s just so much. How could anyone take it all in completely? It’s like eating a rich and delicious food. After a taste, you need a full serving. When you’re done with your serving you want another helping - but you’re so full as it is, it wouldn’t do you any good to try and consume more.

I’m not saying you can get too much of Scripture. As a matter of fact, you really can’t. I’m just in awe of people who can read and read and read - and comprehend, learn - and remember!

It just amazes me — about as much as the things I find in the Word.

Today I was reading in John and it never occurred to me that what Jesus did in purging the temple as it had been being used for merchandising needs to happen today. If you walk into a church building these days, you will find yourself face to face with bookstores and cafes, restaurants, and church promotion stickers, shirts, etc… 

What was an outrage has become commonplace. Then I thought to myself. Where is the line drawn between providing discipleship resources (or an “atmosphere of fellowship”, note the quotation marks) and the blatant exploitation of the Body’s desire to grow? How can church institutions be wary of their motivations in providing the carnal things in a spiritual place?
I agree that the church building is not the church (Kingdom of God), but it is still the holy place where people gather together to worship God and learn in reverence the truths of the Word. 

Jesus Christ was zealous over the temple - and as such - his actions overflowed with a desire for the physical temple to be made pure, attending to the things of God and not the things of the flesh. 

I think it’s time that churches in this world stopped following what is commonplace or seemingly innocent - and evaluated the purpose of everything within its four walls and within the walls of each individual temple of the heart.

Disclaimer: I understand that Jesus had a purpose in this beyond the physical scourging (see John 2:17-25). I had always focused on this - as well as the implicated dishonesty going on in the temple. I was just thinking about its direct applications to the  modern congregations and these short paragraphs were what I had seen. My apologies for not going into depth on its entirety. 

I had learned a wholesome antipathy to everything occult and magical…. not that the ravenous lust was never to tempt me again, but that I now knew it for a temptation. And above all, I now knew that Joy did not point in that direction… Henceforward the Flesh and the Devil, though they could still tempt, could no longer offer me the supreme bribe. I had learned that it was not in their gift. And the World had never pretended to have it.
C.S. Lewis, Suprised by Joy, Chapter Eleven
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